Conversations-14

You seemed to be very happy, Boss. Wassup?
Nothing, Zack.
No, no. I know. You're supremely ... blissfully... glad.
Am I not supposed to be happy and smiling, Zack? What's wrong with you?
Nothing, Boss. But your composed behaviour makes me wonder...
Look, Zack, let me clarify. This has nothing to do with Congress's performance in the elections.
Boss, aren't you jumping up and down on the results day becoz your favourite party was romping home in style and I cannot forget your smugness like your favourite party..
You definitely is anti-Sonia, Zack.
Cool, Boss. You're jumping to conclusions. I am neither anti-Sania...
Not Sania. Sonia, dear.
Sorry, I cannot call her dear Sonia. She's not even Indian...
Stop that nonsense. Even you're not Indian. Tibetan, Lhasa Apso. We respect you. We love you. As much as we respect Sonia and ...
Love her too?
Joking, no, Zack.
Ok, Boss. Tell me wassup? Why you are so happy?
Look, honestly I am happy becoz oil prices started going up.
Ohmigod! You're anti-Indian.
Shutup, Zack! Am not anti-Indian or anything. Remember the boom period we watched as oil shot up to 147 dollars for one barrel? There was all around prosperity. Everybody was dancing. China was chugging along well. India was jumping as you said up and down. Arjun Murthy was predicting 200 dollars.
Who's Arjun Murthy? Infosys Narayana Murthy's son or cousin?
My foot! Arjun is a global investment analyst with Goldman Sachs who had predicted oil price would touch 147 dollars much before it happened. He was a seer. ..
Then, what happened to his 200 dollar forecast? Why did not happen?
Why asking me? Ask him, na?
Boss... Use your common sense...How can I?
Shucks... Zack, I am convinced it may happen.
Boss, you mean oil going back to last July levels?
Yeah... in a way.
What do you mean?
Yes, there is a worldwide recession. Agree?
I do,Sir!
US in deep shit. Europe too. China. India. Gulf...
You mean the Persian Gulf --- Saudi, Qatar, Abu Dhobi...
Not Abu Dhobi... Dhabi... Yes.
Every govt is pumping in shiploads of money to revive their economies. Agree?
Of course, Boss. Though there are thin traffic on roads. More parking space in Nehru Place parking lot...
What's Nehru Place parking lot got to do with you?
You only were telling someone over phone that parking attendants were literally dragging you two days ago to park your car in Nehru Place - even though you were NOT driving anything....
Keen observer, Zack, you're.
Thank you, Boss. All your training. You only taught me to keep my eyes and ears open all time. Ohmigod. Am losing track of my thoughts... What was I saying?
Recession... Govts pumping huge money to revive economy etc etc.
Thanks, Zack. Know why, Zack?
Why what?
Why they are investing so much money?
To save their backs... as you only told me.
Yeah. 100 per cent correct. If US economy does not revive, Obama baba can forget about a possible second term. American voters will send him packing in 2013. Can the 44th US President afford to do that?
No ways, Boss.
Take China. Loss of export market in US and Europe has already led to a large scale retrenchment.
What ... ment?
Retrenchment... meaning throwing people out of job because there is no money to be made and not sure when things will improve.
Like it happened to you...
Think you are smart, Zack, no?
What did I say that hurts you and talk sarc-ky?
You know what I mean. By the way, what is the meaning of sarc-ky?
Sarcastically, Boss.
Ok, ok. We're talking about China. Retrenchment on the one hand and huge purchase of US T Bills.
Tea Bills? Why China should buy American tea?
You dumbo. China has been buying billions of dollars worth of American Treasury Bills. Which are almost worthless today. If China won't buy, who will buy?
Boss, it is getting complicated. Can't follow your T Bill line of thinking. Can you explain?
Americans, you should know, spend more than they earn.
Impossible, Boss.
Americans are good attempting the impossible. You may be a pauper - no job. no income,but you can buy huge mansions in the US.
Why dont you shift US? YOu also don't have a job. no income...
Stupid.
Did you say something nasty, Boss?
.. Nothing... nothing. Greedy bankers lend money eagerly even to those who simply cannot afford to pay even EMIs consistently..
Very interesting, Boss. How do they survive?
You mean the bankers?
Yes, Boss.
They convert the receivables into tradeable instruments and dispose of it to others. Thinking they have covered their backs.
Hmmm.
Interesting, no?
Looks like. What about payback? Who will pay whom on the due date?
Good question. Even a dog knows basics of economics..
Mind your language, Mister... Mind you, I am a co-tenant of my boss - a man who thinks he knows a lot of these economic gibberish.
You mean, me? Thanks. But I don't understand the cotenant part. What's that?
It's very simple, Boss. You and I are co-tenants of this world. This house. How, you want to ask? Hang on. Let me put it this way .... Why do you keep me as your conscience keeper?
Who says you are my conscience keeper? You are my pet. Nothing more, nothing less.
Tell me whom do you share your thoughts - metaphysical or otherwise? Me, na?
Hmmm.
Not even your family. Not even your colleagues? No? .. You use me as your sounding board... No?
Hmmm.
Is it not true that you are gaining some insight through our dialogues? Howevever occasional it may be.
Hmmm.
We more or less occupy the same mindscape, no?
Sort of.
Is it not true, you spend more time with me either in India or outside? Don't we talk daily almost thrice during walks on everything under the sun or moon or sky?
True, but...
During walks, I just listen to your loud thoughts is what you want to say, no?
Yes.
Tell me, is it not true you become silent when you are in the company of even your spouse - she complains no?
You are a master blaster... Fuggedit. I agree that you are a cotenant. Let's return to business.
If China stops buying T Bills of US, Obama will go nuts. So it has to prop up Washington currency as well. Don't know how long.
What about India?
India has a huge domestic economy. China also had, but ignored for a long time. Now woken up to tap this potential. If foreigners have no money to buy, why not try their own kith and kin back home.
Boss, it makes a lot of sense. However, China has to give money to Americans to buy their stuff. Instead, now China is lending its own people to generate demand... right?
Zack, which business school you studied?
Am in the running for Nobel?
Shutup. Idiot. Overambitious.Do you know what Black Swan Nassib tells about economists?
No. What's he saying?
He says economists are bunch of jokers and idiots.
Let him say whatever he wants. It does not bother me. I know my onions, Boss.
So... China is helping its domestic economy to kickstart revival. India also.
What about the Gulf?
They have of late started looking inwards. Investing in infrastructure development withuot losing steam though meltdown has affected them badly.
Haan..Are they not affected due to the huge fall in oil prices - from 147 to 63 dollars a barrel?
Yes, Zack. But they will survive becoz the actual cost of a barrel costs very little. But when loaded with developmental costs, it goes up. Even 40 dollars is more than sufficient to keep them afloat.
Coming back, why you are happy?
Zack, when the engines of Chinese and Indian eocnomy begin to roar, they need energy.Alternate energy sources development will take ages. So oil is the only alternate. So demand for oil is bound to go up. It is good news for gulf.
So what?
A huge chunk of indians work in the Gulf. And they are now back home due to recession in Gulf also. When oil prices go up, projects will resume work and they may return. More forex remittance. Good for them. Good for India.
Good for you also, no? Boss?
Sort of. ... Hey, are you leaving...
Yeah.
Going where? Zack?
For a lecture at FICCI.
Wat?
The business lobbyists have invited Finance Minister Pranabda to talk about new govt, new challenges. Am going.
What about CII? Are they not
.. hosting their meet with FM?
Yeah, Zack.
Yes, they will. But they lost the race to Ficci.
How?
Because FICCI general secretary is a Bong. Pranabda, you know...
What a judgement, Zack. Good luck! Come back soon.
Bye, Boss.

Wat's in your neck-bag?

Rossogulla..... You know why, Boss!